He was outstanding in his field.
Category: Dad Jokes
Fishing?
I’m okay at fishing but I cod be better.
elephant
One morning, I shot an elephant in my pyjamas. How he got into my pyjamas, I don’t know.
Did you know that the Roman empire fell over ten days ago?
Robot music:
Q. What type of music do robots listen to?
A. Bebop
Sounds Wasps Make
I bought a vinyl record yesterday called “Sounds Wasps Make”.
When I got home and played the record, it didn’t sound anything like wasps.
Then I realised I was playing the bee side.
My dogs…
He’s not wrong
In a nutshell, this is a tree
I’ve tried a lot of unemployment jokes…
None of them work
I know every single phone number
It would be more useful if I knew who they were assigned to.
My wife just completed a 40 day body building program
It’s a boy. He weighs 8 lbs.
What do sea monsters eat?
Fish and ships
What do you call an old snowman?
Water
This is my step ladder
I never knew my real ladder.
I fell off a 50 ft. ladder today
I was okay. I fell off the bottom rung.
Can a cow hide
No, that’s not how you make leather.
I made a fish soup
It turns out that it would have preferred krill.
Reblog of trickykat via Matt:
Boxing joke?
Yeah, I could tell you a boxing joke just as soon as I can think of a punchline.
I would tell you the joke about the bad pole vaulter
but it never goes over very well.
I hear venison is…
…very dear at the moment
I watched a movie about a man eating chicken
It was ten feet tall and ate half the people in the town.
I’m trying to give up innuendo
but it’s hard; it’s so hard.